The Ever-Expanding World Wide Web

The mind boggles.

How long has this thing been going on?

When I moved up to Vancouver in '94 for a respite from the Northridge earthquake, among other annoyances, the world wide web was in its infancy. A few stagnant web pages forging a trail. I even did a little graphics work for some of the pioneers...a masthead here and there, a few buttons. When I decided to come back to L.A. in '95 I searched for a moving company on the web. There were less than five.

There were a few networking opportunities - I used to hang out in an AOL chatroom aimed at film industry folks - and there was email...but nothing like myspace, facebook, plaxo and linkedin blah, blah, blah.

Not a day goes by that I don't get a request from someone somewhere wanting me to sign up to the next best networking network. Do we really need all of them? In this time of unemployment is networking the new full time job? That's what it feels like to me.

I recently joined facebook - you can find me under my real name and become my friend - which I am just realizing its benefits. It's a way for me to reach out to people that are into the musicians in my book, helping me attain my goal of keeping their memory[ies] alive. And it will also be a great way to publicize an event that I'm planning in the coming months. However, I still don't know all the ins and outs of facebook and am finding the learning curve annoying, even though I'm pretty sure a two year old could do it.

And this brings me to the latest networking thingy I've been told I MUST join and utilize...

As you can see in the picture I'm 'following' no one, I have no 'followers' and I've made 0 'updates'...whatever all that means. Oh, I know...it means I've done nothing. And do you know why I've done nothing? Because I've come down with Twitter Paralysis. It's the latest malady that I'm sure the prescription drug companies have already designed a pill for. I liken it the Restless Leg Syndrome. Anyway, I'm on the jumping off point of the learning curve and I don't have a clue. Go ahead and laugh. I hear the echoing..."ha, ha, ha... a two year old could do it."

I've heard I can have this very blog go out through Twitter and people will flock to read my sometimes witty words. But I don't know how to hook it up.

I want to get a ton of followers so I can invite everybody to the way-cool event I'm planning. But I don't know how to get followers. Heck, I don't even know how to follow.

Where's Jesus when I need him. He's gotta be the authority on followers, right? How do I get followers without looking like the complete idiot I am in the process? How long do you think it will take me to get a million? Should I go for a million? Hmmm, I think 5 million sounds better.

I'm sure there's a lot of other interesting ways I can make use of Twitter - wait, I have to learn how to tweat, don't I? But that's a bird thing, not a Chesher Cat thing. My Oh My. And I've seen people doing that @so-and-so thing, which I get but I don't get at the same time. Is the room spinning or is that what's left of my brain?

As I was muddling my way through this whole Twitter thing, a friend posted a link that showed up in my facebook newsfeed. I clicked it and was presented with this ever so timely cartoon...

My sentiments exactly.

The mind continues to boggle.

Help.